Social networking sites are huge, and for many the only way to meet someone new.  I recently had two women come in from Chicago who were ready to "get back out there."  They had after photos taken, and with their new ideal face to present to the matchmaking world, they were armed with presenting their best to, hopefully, find their best mate.  I know they will.  We got them into the right shade of lip color, for crying out loud, what else do you need?

My mother was single twice in her life.  As a teenager then after my father passed on in July of 2002.  It wasn't an easy time, of course, having lost her husband of 42 year at age 62 (he was 64).  It was, frankly, an emotional journey.  Until she happened to fall completely, head over heels in love.  Again.  

Joann Hopkins and Michael Hopkins, 1961

I'd like to say it happened to her, but really, I made it happen.  Yes, I'll take the credit.  I'm a believer in "you create your life, so make it how you want" even though she is a product of "don't expect too much or you're sure to be disappointed."

So when, after about three years, it appeared the fog was beginning to clear, I jumped.  For the first three years following my father's death my mother was "absolutely not interested" in meeting anyone.  Understandable.  I was sympathetic.  But as yet another holiday season approached where we were going to try not to be maudlin about her widowhood, I saw a glimmer.  Compliments were beginning to be met with "yeah, well a lot of good it does when there's no one to appreciate it."  It was a sign.

One night when were outside at a lovely restaurant, the summer breeze giving soft billows to her gauzey pastel pink blouse a woman commented on how beautiful she was, and wondered if she was single.  

"Yes,"  she said.  

"I know a man..."  and out of the corner of my eye I saw a card being passed.  That was it.  

I went home and signed her up on match.com.  Up went the photos, the profile was crafted and the following night we had her over for dinner.  I had talked about dating sites before, but she was not remotely interested, and didn't even have a computer.  

"I don't want one.  I hate computers.  They are going to be the downfall of our world."  

After a martini (two, I'm pretty sure), I told her.  

"I put you on match.com."  

"NOOOOO!  I don't WANT my face plastered all over the internet.  I don't know who is looking at me..."

"If you don't want to be a burden to your children, Mother, the only way is to be a burden to someone else, and the only way you're going to meet someone else is on the computer."  

"NOOOO!  No one is going to compare to your father.  They're all old and icky.  They just want someone to take care of them.... I don't want.....who is that?... NO!!"   

Fast forward and skip the dating stories, she has been, for over two years now, in a committed relationship with "her love" and in permanent residence with her new soul mate.  They are inseparable, and just about the time many women think the best is behind them, these two crazy kids in love are looking forward to the wonders yet to come.  

My point, obviously, is that anyone can find "true love" today, even at the click of a mouse.  And though it may take a bit of prodding, and bit of issue resolving, it's right there.  Waiting.  My mother is now 68 and living with the man she loves.  Don is 65 a loving the woman with whome he lives.  We can worry about the economy and worry about our future, but when it comes to finding true love again, or for the first time, it's a great time to be living.  


Joann Hopkins and Don Phillips, December 2008