Charla Krupp, author of "How Not to Look Old," starts off her book with two words:  "Aging sucks."  I wrote my book with the distinct idea that, no, aging doesn't suck, getting OLD sucks. There's a difference. I theorize that you can get old at any age, and be young, at least in spirit, forever.  Let's define young, however.  I'm young.  But my hair color is distinctly not.  I'm young, but the joint in my shoulder, according to my MRI, is not.  I'm young, but my hangover recovery time is definitely not.  

Recently I've been uniquely aware that from a combination of how I look and how younger people perceive those of us over the age limit, I must present myself in a matter appropriate to someone my age.  It's like dressing for the occasion.   

I recently heard an advertisement on the radio for a new club in town called "Dive Bar."  It was one of those thumping, hectic, "go now," radio ads with an announcer that repeatedly names the advertisers company.  "Dive bar..at DIVE bar, make sure you go to DIVE BAR..."  I rolled my eyes.  I had no desire to go to Dive Bar. Of course, that was obviously what Dive Bar wanted -- to appeal to the same people who shop a heavily fragranced, music thumping Abercrombie and Fitch store.   

I can hear my younger staff talking now about having been to "Dive  Bar" and wasn't it hilarious how Tanya got totally smashed and they had to carry her out and she lost her keys and her cell phone and some woman who had taken a punch at her threw them in the street, and....

Later I can hear them saying "You should come!  We'd have a BLAST!"  

I will repeat,  "No, I've done all that.  You go ahead."

And boom -- I'm old.  I sound old.  I actually sort of feel old.  In a good way, yes, but still, old.  I often wonder what has changed. Aside from the hangover recovery time.  Which seriously, I could get just as trashed right at home in front of my television with my two friends martini and croustini  

A part of me would "TOTALLY" love to go.  But the realization that I am distinctly out of the market for that radio ad gives me a familiar feeling.  The feeling that I'd go, and become strongly aware, of how much older I am than the majority.